Mining Memories

After observing different kinds of relationships and of course from my personal experience, I recently had a realization. Few days ago my mum was angry over some reason I still don’t know, maybe her obvious frustration that she has to deal with all the challenges without dad. In her anger she just gave away freshly cooked food, just because I didn't wanted to eat that moment, and she was fighting with me for reasons which were otherwise not wrong to her.  Also just a couple of days back, my friends had a fight over a small thing but it went for quite a long time and it went on increasing for almost 2 days. I have also faced similar senseless, pointless fights with my dear ones. What I realized is, the main reason we fight is because we are so much determined to prove that it was the other person’s fault due to which the fight never ends and the battle starts with most common statements like, “I did so because You always do the same…”, “ If I didn't call couldn't you

“ If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his language, that goes to his heart. ” - Nelson Mandela . As I read this line, I started thinking over it. Besides its direct meaning, a different interpretation occurred to me; I thought,  isn't  it a reason why people believe in ‘Tit for Tat’ , to try to hurt others in the same way and in the same language as they might have knowingly or unknowingly offended us. I don’t know exactly how much percent of people do it; but, I am definitely one of them, who wait till the right time to fire back exactly the same words so that it affects or rather hurts more. And those who are not from this species, they have a different way to follow this principle, most others cannot be calm and peaceful unless they have insulted their so-called offender enough, may not be in exactly same words, but in many ways that can best hurt others. In fact, you must have heard many people proudly say, “No

Just a small incident I wish to share. Krsna has His own ways to instruct. Recently I was caught by the TC; as my season ticket (monthly pass) expired just the previous day. I had completely forgotten about renewing my pass. I requested him to excuse me as it was an honest mistake. But he was very strict and penalized me with an amount which could have got me a travel for more than 2 months. My mom and friends mockingly laughed at me. They found it quite amazing because I am always very particular about having proper tickets, giving rightful fare; just try to follow senior devotees. But this incident was an epic for them. My mom said good lesson for you, some friends said never mind. For me it was very embarrassing. Although I too laughed at it, but somewhere I was affected by it. I realized, just a carelessness of one day, and I was penalized despite of following the ethics all the time every time. This incident taught me the importance of being alert and careful, we may have b

Reading through the pages of ‘ Nectar Stream ’ a book by HH Radhanath Maharaj, gifted to me by one of my dear God-sisters, I came across this quote, “ In this age of Kali, moving mountains is easier than trying to co-operate”. It brought a grin on my face. “How true!” I exclaimed to myself and continued with my routine. Now all those who have the experience of the Mumbai locals especially the mumbaikars will agree with me that an unpredictable fight or a senseless argument is obvious in the compartment; especially among the female passengers. That day I witnessed one such argument among two ladies. Out of them one seemed to be highly religious and powerful, at least by the statement she made. She said to the other woman that just because she fought with her god will punish her severely. I wondered. Is this what we understand about religion and spirituality? Will God even consider the prayers and pleas of this woman? How can any religion make someone so vengeful and intolerant?

I always wondered why Srila Prabhupad said we are Krishna’s dog. This thought always bothered me why he chose a dog. Few days ago one of a very old friend of my family engaged himself and me in a long conversation. By Krsna’s unlimited mercy I am surrounded by souls who are extremely spiritual in various faiths. This uncle mentioned about qualities of Dog. He said a dog has up to 40 qualities; out of which one of the most important qualities is his humility. No matter how much you hit your dog, scold them, be rude to them they will still wag their tails on seeing you. They are so faithful that no matter what it takes they will always try to defend you from any potential danger.. After he went I reflected on our conversation, and was wondering we are not even as good as dogs and we feel so proud of ourselves. I remembered Srila Prabhupad often asked to feel like a dog, and my doubt was resolved why a dog? My Guru Maharaj HH Radhanath Swami explains the principle of  Opposites attr

“King of the world Thou art poor; Happiness is with the Servant for Sure” “It is true that wealth and luxuries make you glad; however, there is no use of this momentary gladness. One can be contented perpetually merely by giving happiness to others. One can gain serenity by bringing a modest smile on gloomy face one can experience showers of blessings by satisfying a starving stomach. One can attain triumph on sorrow just by tending a wound; Sheathing a stripped or simply by doing little to add joy to this mourning world by serving unconditionally- not the ones who can repay you- will craft you as the most happiest person on this soil.” I found this note on a sheet of paper when I was cleaning my treasure boxes on Sunday. I wrote it when I was in School class 8; I remember we were learning Be-attitudes in our religion class which made me elaborate this. But while reading it now I found something missing in it. Perhaps something that I experienced over the years or I learnt in

I was attracted by a beautiful girl, who seemed to be my Samaritan and I felt that she could be my best friend. She was very pretty and talked very pleasingly, this illusion ended when I discovered she was a terrorist disguised, her intention was not to physically harm me, but she would not let me speak to anyone, not make any phone call or send any message. I was kind of home arrested by her. I tried to lock her in and escape but she caught me. I called the police they seemed least bothered and said they would come the next day to arrest her. She was laughing at me, in anger I tried to chop her with a knife and I kept stabbing her, but she won’t die. I chopped off her leg and made scars all over her body but she still laughed at me looking even more ferocious. I called some butchers to take and just cut her off into pieces because there was no way to destroy her, she escaped them and jumped into a pool pretending to be dead, but just when I relaxed she came back and called for me

Not really some realizations but just a day collected in my memory bag . . . The day began with guilt of Waking up late, compensating for which I made a plan to go to temple with my mom and my cute little cousin; to my frustration the plan was cancelled when my mother suddenly remembered my Grandma’s invitation to her home. I agreed to it as my Grandma made me promise a visit to her. So it was six of us (my aunt and her two daughters also joined in) who finally decided to surprise Grandma. . . Somewhat convinced and equally disappointed with the change of plan, I tried to accept my Day as it came. Due to the usual rush of Mumbai local, all six of us dispersed in different corners of the compartment in search of a place to sit. Nothing better could have happened, as I found sometime to chant rather than force myself into traditional talks with my mom or aunt. I felt good after few rounds and had kept aside my beads when my cousin came to call me saying that they got seats f

Most relationships comprise of different flavors: a little Care, a little fight, a little joy, a little happiness, a little tension but the bottom line is everything is cooked with Love. Every new dish that we taste every day is cooked on love; be it sweet ‘kheer’ of caring words or ‘chilly paneer’ of fights the fire that cooks it is Love and that is what is important. The Hypocrisy of “I” is that, when we are happy and our Ego is satisfied, we see the fire of love behind every dish and appreciate the feelings; but when “I” does not get its expected Importance, the same fire of love appears to be volcano of misunderstanding. What to speak of the spicy ‘chilly paneer’ (fights) even the ‘kheer’ appears to be an expression of sarcasm. There is no problem in expressing anger, irritation or frustration. We need variation in Life, imagine eating only rice every day or only kheer every day or only karela every day; sounds boring, isn’t it? Recently I read this quote online “

Often we face many obstacles and Challenges in our endeavor to practice Devotional Services. Financial Obstacles, Pressures from Family and Peers, Our own instability and fear and there are many more thoughts haunt our mind all the time. It is very difficult to keep our mind Vacant, but is it a wise option to keep it occupied with worries and fears? Neither worrying reduces the Worry nor Does Fear removes the Fear, it only adds to anxiety. But we are accustomed to these kinds of Extra Curricular Activities, We make it our Prime duty to deal with the obstacles ourselves, to try and try to remove it, to keep plotting plans to be obstacle free. Let us ask ourselves, “Do we really want these obstacles out to perform our sadhna better or is it because we do not want to take efforts?” Mostly it is the latter part. Krishna Loves Butter; he steals away the best butter. So why not try to become that Best butter and then Offer ourselves to Krishna? But to become the Best Butter we need

I had once read somewhere "Behavior is the mirror in which everyone shows their image." It was a good line to read then but realised its meaning tonight. Realised how the snake of anger raises its fangs when the ego is pricked.Like a mirror our Life reflects back what we think into it, When I saw my behaviour reflecting my thoughts I can't express how disgusted I am to see them.Believe me it isn't a beautiful sight. In the fantasy world of praises and appreciations an encounter with reality revealed the mirror image of my heart, this mirror was nothing else but my own rude and angry behaviour. By Krishna's mercy and association of Excellent devotees, I could pause for a while and reflect on my actions. I wish I had an eraser or an UNDO button, to just delete the abominable side of my actions. But instead of being sorry that I do not have any such tool, I am happy there isnt any eraser or an UNDO button in Life. Because if it was, then we would recklessly

Reading through some quotes in my Collection I came across this morning, " Even Harsh words is Violence "- HH Radhanath Maharaj. What kind of violence this is, no weapons but can cause the greatest injury. And many a times this kind of violence is not between strangers, but only our dear ones, whom we are supposed to be Loving. Sometimes we experience the consequences of frustrated emotions and expectations, This experience makes us unhappy resulting in Anger, Depression, Hopelessness, Insensitivity, Envy, Confliction, Lonliness, Violence, Selfishness, Vengfulness and whats most destructive is we become UNFORGIVING. When few people come together as family, they seek support, understanding, acceptance and above all LOVE. It is very easy to support each other, help each other, understand, accept and Love each other when things are pleasing to our ego. But how many times do we make an attempt to support a person who had dejected us, to understand when someone was rude an

A realisation which got inspired after reading 'IDLE GOSSIP' of a friend. Krishna says in Bhagvat Gita 10:30- "Among subduers I am Time"   Thinking over just this one line. It means every day is Krsna, Every hour, Every minute, every second, every millisecond is KRISHNA. Can't this be one reason why we are advised since ages that we must not waste time? We must make the optimum use of our time. what we do with our time is actually what we do with krsna. Isn't it therefore better to always utilize our time in the pleasure of Krishna. Also its so amazing to realise and feel krishna in every moment. Its Krishna everywhere, and Everytime With us.

I dont know how to stop  lamenting I dont kn0w how to stop missing him the face that i saw in my dream last night is still before my eyes all I do is sit before my altar and tell my kanu 'I am Sorry' my behaviour seems immature but I believe its very Human I dont know how to stop wishing for ONE oportunity to meet him and tell him all i feel for him all that I ever felt. Also an opportunity to know all tht he ever thought about me. And in this gloominess I usually get frustrated Because I dont know how to react, how to feel sometimes even a big injury won't affect me sometimes even a small argument makes me mad i know I should learn how to deal with it but as of now I am unable to get through it. May be i will learn someday Upset this morning when I looked at my Gopinath, he reminded me of the Caring Shelter Workhop that I attended couple of months back. The words that echoed in my mind was "Its OK to be SAD" I know one day I will practically a

Walking back the memory lane this evening I reached an evening which held a vivid place in my memories. With project papers on the writing pad, research materials like books, printouts spread accross my study table I was reading through one of the books - A life sketch of Meerabai- and came accross this Poem "main Giridhar ke ghar jaaun Giridhar mharo saacho pritam dekhat roop lubhaun jaha bithaawe tith hi baithu beche toh bik jaaun Meera k prabhu Giridhar naagar bar bar bali jaaun" I felt these words through tears. For some strange reason I felt extremely happy, I felt proud of I don't know what. As if I achieved everything humanly possible and I have nothing else to Desire. A feeling of belonging began to embrace me. I belong to that Giridhari, I am owned by him, I am a puppet of his hand completely at his disposal and the fact that I was happy about it seemed crazy to me then. But it didnt matter. All I wanted is to just live with that feeling. That state of h

Lamha lamha dohraaye yeh gum ka naya bahana hai Do pal muskaakar murjhaya yeh kaisa suman diwana hai kuch pal baithu koi baat karu jo chand zara khil jaaye toh jee bhar dekhu har raat jagu koi dost kabhi mil jaye toh. Raat sakhi jeevan bhar ki par dost ko ek din jana hai Do pal muskaakar murjhaya yeh kaisa suman diwana hai mann pagla pal-pal ghabraaye na bole kuch sunta jaaye jane gehri kya baat chupi jo chaahe par keh na paaye Na samjhe kuch na chaahe kuch khud hi mein ise samaana hai Do pal muskaakar murjhaya yeh kaisa suman diwana hai har paath jale din-raat jale par bhi andhiyara chhoote na bhar bhar ojhal ho kar bhi kyun naino ke baadal toote na raah take har shaam na jane kise yaha phir aana hai Do pal muskaakar murjhaya yeh kaisa suman diwana hai na jane kis mod pe aakar ye raah bawree suljhegi kya jane fir koi nayi manzil se jaakar uljhegi. Mann chahe ab so wo kare humko na ise samjhana hai Do pal muskaakar murjhaya yeh kaisa suman diwana hai

Love is always patient and kind it is never boastful nor conceited it is never rude or selfish it does not take offence and is not resentful Love takes no pleasure in other people's saneness but delights in truth it is always ready to excuse to trust to hope enduring whatever comes Thank you for always being there for me. For Tolerating my anger and impatience. You never complained but always treated me with patience and Love. There were many times when I was ungrateful and selfish but you still forgave all my mistakes. You always offered me your unconditional Love. You were there for me in my failure and you rejoiced in my every achievement. You comforted me when I was upset. You held my hand and guided me when my journey seemed tough. Who else can ever Love me as you do? Who else can ever be so patient? Forgive me that I cannot Love you back as much, I am too caught up in my busy life, I realize you are waiting for me, so that I can speak with you, spend some good time w

Talking with a friend this morning a very interesting conversation filled my thoughts. This conversation was with my Counselor few years ago. After a long gap of around one month I could finally visit temple, I was very excited and RadhaRaasbihariji were wearing my favorite blue and silver with an even more beautiful ‘Pagdi’ (turban). That was not all. Even RadhaBankimrai (my counselor’s deities) were in a brilliant golden dress. My eyes celebrated the most blissful festivals of the darshan. Few thoughts began to race in my mind and I simply asked Mataji, “Mataji, Krishna blesses with a desire to serve him, to see him, then there are obstacles, then He makes the way, then we come to him thinking that we are pleasing him by doing so; but if we observe It is actually He who is making us Happy. Then what are we doing?” Mataji smiled and she replied, “We tell him that we want him. We accept to be his servants.” That’s all. Bhakti is so simple; just firmly accept to be his servant. Just

The Lost Sheep Friday morning was a Hasty morning…  Many things to do, very little time... Since few days Heart was extremely troubled, with so many pressures at the same time…  And just as I was about to leave home, My Grandfather’s best friend arrived at my place to meet us. HE opened is bible and was reading some verses to me, “Do not let your hearts be troubled.   You believe   in God;   believe also in me. ”- John 14.   Then he read to me “ What do you think? If a man has a hundred sheep, and one of them has gone astray, does he not leave the ninety-nine on the mountains and go in search of the one that went astray? And if he finds it, truly, I say to you, he rejoices over it more than over the ninety-nine that never went astray. So it is not the will of my Father who is in heaven that one of these little ones should perish. ” –Mathew: 18 This verse just touched my heart. All over his Creations he is simply spreading the messages Calling us back home. It reminded me of